KooKoo Bird 'sez --The Loov was a castle of King Lewis the Eleventeenth once, but the King moved to the country to grow some turnips and rhubarb, so they decided to put the famous paintings on one side and the guillotine people on the other. When the artists made a mistake, someone would say, "Heads will roll!" and everyone would laugh.
Today The Loov makes you give them some money to see the Paintings and you can hang-out all day and look at them and get yer picture taken and stuff and go to the lunchroom and get the fancy desert for twice you paid to get in, but when the guy in the uniform sez head towards the door, you gotta' head towards the door.
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"Stoopid Card Cheating Guy?" / de la Tour Kat de la Tour Kat played a lot of kards for the monies so he knew what he was talking about here with the guys cheating and the guy in red is smiling but the inside is thinking "My luck is bad today, ain't it..." and if he wasn't looking at his kards all the time he might see what's going on. Hey! Guy in the Red! Wake up! |
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"Chester Got His Loot" / Hals Kat Hals Kat liked to paint the common peoples, but not the peoples who were too common he told some peoples, so scram. This picture is of Chester, and when the King was sad he would shout "Where's my Chester? And Chester would grab some loot and run to the store and get the King a slurppy then play him some blugrass muzik on his big banjo. |
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Libbirdy Leading the People to a Fish Market / Delacroix Kat |
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"The Mowsy Lisa" / da Vinci Kat This is the Famous Mowsy Lisa and it's worth so much money the renters insurance won't cover it, so don't steal it or you'll get caught. When they asked the Picasso why he stole The Mowsy Lisa in the 19eleventeen and the Picasso said, "I didn't steal nuthin', fuzz, I'm just smoking the reefer and painting me sum nudes." Later, when he was in the Klink, he thought maybe he shouldn't have said about the reefer and the nudes and the fuzz and stuff. |
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Self-Portrait of the Artist Holding Kartnip / Durer Kat |
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"Another Self-Portrait, Huh?" / Rembrandt Kat Rembrandt Kat was always making the pictures of himself and when he would finish he would say "Yoo handsome devil, yoo," then he would try to sell the pictures to people who didn't even look like him fur their houses and they would say no cuz' the picture didn't look like anyone they knew but ol' Rembrandt here. But he'd juss go ahead and paint another. |
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"Portrait of Cornpone van der Feest" Van Dyck Kat Corpone van der Feest was the boat guy who sailed to the other places and got the spicy foods and brought them back home and told everyone, "Come An' Get It!" Corny was on the high sea's when he thought, "I wish i had sum food now, in a can that has the pull top on the top so I didn't need the can opener and could eat it now." So he invented the food in the can with the pull-top on the top and was eating when he wanted and soon all the other guys wanted the can food and soon Corny was selling the food to just about everyone. Savory Salmon is good. Ol' Corny called his food "Cornpone van der Feests Feestbeest", then it was called "Beest Feest", and then "Fancy Feest Beest" and finally just Fancy Feest. What a guy... |
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"The Lunch Maker" / Vermeer Kat This is the graceful picture of the beautiful scene as the girl gets the Fancy Feest ready for the kat with the love that a good Fancy Feest deserves. Lotsa' kats would say "Hey, juss plop it on the plate and lets go," but not this kat who says "Fork it up, baby, cuz I hate eatin' it when it's in can shape, and don't be stingy with that gravy, and the water bowl smells like the creek out back so chop chop." |
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