KooKoo Bird 'sez --The Depressionists were guys who did the paintings in Paris and also in France. They were called The Depressionists because they wanted to get their paintings in the famous Hair Salons of Paris but Charles the Galle wouldn't let them so they were always depressed and painted the faces with the sadness because that's what they could understand.
The Depressionists painted outdoors alot because the indoors smelled like cooked fish too much cuz they couldn't afford sum taco's or hamburgers like the rich peoples. They would all get together on the week-ends and paint each other sum portraits and drink the wine and say stuff like, "Sum day peoples will make zillions frum our pictures, but for now, where's your San'Box?"
When The Depressionist were the old men and painting sum flowers and stuff they were finally invited to the Hair Salons by Napoleon, but they told old Boney, "Sorry Bub, but we are old men now and get our hair cut on-line! Shoo!!" Then they moved to the country and went insane for awhile.
 |
"Kats an Kards" / Cezanne Kat Cezanne Kat was a painter who was always ahead of his time and sum times would show up fur breakfast like three hours before it was time fur breakfast. He painted his feelings and perceptions but everyone said "Juss paint us some dawgs playing poker so we can cover up the spots on these walls." That's the kind of baloney that would make him blow his stack. |
 |
"Stoopid Absinthe" / Degas Kat This is the real Depressionist Painting cuz' the people are depressed cuz' they drink the booze with the worms wood that makes them all wacky when they walk home and then they see The Green Faeries and then they call Ralph on the big white phone. When Degas Kat painted this he drank the bourbon and said "No worms wood fur me, thank yoo. |
 |
"Twinkle Toes" / Degas Kat Sum times when Degas Kat would ferget the paints and brushes at home he would use the pastels and the chaks and rub it with his fingers and say "Quit fidgiting or yool look like a Picasso and that ain't my style, man." He did the dancer kats who do the belly dance and he would be back stage 'til the usher guy said "I don't care if yer painting the bathroom dark grey, bub! Scram! |
 |
"La Feest sur la Terre" (Fancy Feest on the Groun') / Manet Kat Holy Cow on this painting, huh? If yer in the woods and it's a nice day and yer eating some good Fancy Feest and no one's around to say "Don't gobble it down so fast, bub" then why ruin it with the human who's naked and then stares at you. And what the heck is Mowse doing back there? Lordy... |
 |
"The Poopy Field" / Monet Kat Monet Kat was painting this one on Easter when it was a sunny day and all the Easter Eggs had been rounded up. He painted the people on top of the hill, but then he wanted to paint them down the hill, so he shrugged his shoulders and did both cuz' he forgot the eraser at home. No one has faces here cuz' Monet Kat was too far away and couldn't see the eyes or noses or nuthin'. |
 |
| Ruined Cathedral / Monet Kat |
No comments:
Post a Comment